easier than i tought.. i found the solution .. to connect to compact sql server in SMME 2005 you need at least SP2...

SO: Windows XP -SP3

I had installed the required components for Managment Studio 2008, so i uninstalled them and installed the SQL Compact files for Management 2005.
( 3 files: VisualStudio Tools, SqlServerCompon ent and SDK )

I can manage the DB throught VS2005 - PRO, but in Management Studio the ComboBox to choose the Sql Server Compact DB is still not available like it was in 2008... guessing i can manually...